I hate speaking of crumminess in such a wonder-filled holiday season of love and joy, but this is just plain crummy.

For months, I have been wanting to get my very own digital camera. Kirk has one, but it's more professional than I need and bulky to tote around. I've been dreaming of a sleek, streamlined, easy to use camera that I can carry around in my purse, as I catch myself in so many candid moments where I'm thinking, "If I just had a camera in my purse, I could pull it out and capture this great moment!"

Knowing this would be a big investment during a modest financial season of our lives, I held off expressing the fullness of this desire out loud too much. But it just kept growing. Finally, I told Kirk that this is what I would really love to receive for Christmas, in place of any other gift at all.

So, he did it. He got a sense for the features that were most important to me and went to town looking for a suitable fit. He landed on what he says is the perfect one, and he purchased it. He walked around for a few days after that with a smile on his face, so pleased was he with what he had found, and he shared his excitement about watching me open it for Christmas.

Because we'll be in California for the holiday, we decided a couple weeks ago to do all our Christmas shopping online and have everything directly shipped to my mom's address. The gifts started showing up on her doorstep. Then we got the news that my aunt in Minnesota passed away; she had been battling cancer for many years, but took a quick turn for the worse at the end. My mom packed her bags and headed out to be with her sisters for a few days. She arranged to have her neighbor pick up packages left on her doorstep each day.

Just before she left for the airport, she found a notice on her door for a Fedex delivery. She decided to take the notice with her so that she could call and have it held until she got home. Except that when she did make the call, she learned the package (which, of course, turned out to be the package with the camera in it) had been delivered and signed for by some unknown "G. Ramirez" shortly after she had left for the airport.

Who in the heck shows up on the doorstep of other people's homes to sign for and steal special packages intended as gifts for actual loved ones? Who does that? Crummy jerks, that's who.

We're having the package traced and also put in a request to talk to the Fedex driver about his recollection of what happened on that day. Who knows if we'll somehow track it down or receive any information that's actually helpful or makes us feel any better. More likely we'll file some claim with Fedex for reimbursement or struggle to some agreement with our credit card company. Or else we'll try these routes and get nowhere, eventually (maybe) purchasing a second camera that ends up costing us the price of two when all is said and done.

I'm bummed. Kirk's bummed. My mom's bummed. We're all pretty upset, too, both at the jerkiness of people and at the irresponsibility of Fedex leaving the package with someone for whom the package isn't named. It's so frustrating, too, that it happened in a situation already charged with such emotion and that could not have been avoided at all. We're praying, though, both for G. Ramirez and our own angry hearts not to be overcome with that anger in a season that's not about gifts anyway.